We're so busy that we don't allow ourselves to be in the present

 

"We're so busy that we don't allow ourselves to be in the present," she said, noting that being present for others is a great gift to them. "Being there for the other person without a better story is being a good listener," stated a slide she showed during her talk. And she said silence and meditation also are important for developing a relationship with God or a higher power. "We have to ask ourselves, 'Are we human beings or are we human doings?" She noted that the creation was not completed until God declared a day of rest. "The Lord said, 'Learn from me and you will find rest,'" she said. Mongeon said living by spiritual principles will provide new energy and new hope. She said what the world needs more than ever is people of hope. "You and I are the ones who can provide hope."

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A grateful heart is never sad

 

living by eight spiritual values: positive attitude, friendship, simplicity and ordinariness, humor, forgiveness, gratitude, mindfulness and spiritual freedom. "People say to me, 'Why do you smile so much?' I say I need it," she said in her talk about positive attitudes. "We must esteem ourselves before we can esteem others." She also discussed the need to develop a loving eye with which to view the world. While discussing friendship, she said "Learning to be a powerful presence in another's life is just so, so beautiful." And she said people make themselves rich by making their wants fewer. "May I live simply that others simply can live," Mongeon said, quoting Gandhi. To achieve the value of humor, Mongeon suggested learning from children. "Children laugh 60 times a day, but we laugh six at best," she said. "They say six good laughs a day are as good as a five-mile run." Mongeon defined forgiveness as the capacity to go beyond our hurts and put them in the hands of God. "I cannot forgive unless I employ God," she said. And seeing the good God has placed in one's life can be done through a gratitude journal, she said, noting her belief that gratitude is the greatest antidote to depression. "A grateful heart is never sad," she said. "The expression of gratitude is the most powerful act we can perform to God, ourselves and others. ... It changes the negative back to the positive and takes away the hurts." Mongeon said savoring the moment creates mindfulness.

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Key Concepts from the 1940's

1. Put no block between the newcomer and Step Twelve.

Get the newcomer to Step Twelve as quickly as possible, so he or she can experience the life-changing spiritual awakening that occurs as the direct result of taking the Steps. Assure the newcomer that our program of recovery will relieve his or her alcoholism/addiction. Show the newcomer that the process is simple, straightforward and that it really works.

2. Call the newcomer!

Demonstrate that you are there for the newcomer by checking in with him or her on a regular basis. Remember, the newcomer is very ill and needs your encouragement and support.

3. Read the appropriate parts of the "Big Book" to the newcomer.

The newcomer is in no physical or emotional condition to read, let alone comprehend, the "Big Book" by him or herself. Therefore, read and explain the appropriate parts of the book to the newcomer, specifically those 50 or so passages that pertain directly to taking the Twelve Steps.

4. The healing is in the sharing not in the writing.

Sit down with newcomer and guide him or her through the Fourth Step inventory. If necessary, write the inventory while the newcomer does the talking. this will help relieve any anxiety or apprehension the newcomer may have about this part of the program.

5. Assist the newcomer with his or her amends.

Work together on the newcomer's amends. Be the first person the newcomer sees after an amends is made.

6. Share guidance with the newcomer.

Show the newcomer that you believe in and are practicing two-way pryer on a daily basis.

7. Co-sponsor the next newcomer.

Have the newcomer accompany you as you work with the next person. This way, the newcomer will gain confidence in his or her ability to guide others through the recovery process.

Sponsorship (A.A. Grapevine, April 1961)

"Though three hundred thousand have recovered in the last twenty-five years, maybe half a million more have walked into our midst, and then out again."

"We can't well content ourselves with the view that all these recovery failures were entirely the fault of the newcomers themselves. Perhaps a great many didn't receive the kind and amount of sponsorship they so sorely needed. We didn't communicate when we might have done so. So we AA's failed them." -- Bill W.

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